Show Notes
Mariah Freya Interview
[00:00:00] Charna Cassell: Welcome back to Lead Open Podcast. This is your host, Charna Cassell. And today we have Mariah Freya, who's a sex coach and she's the founder of BBeducated, which is an online platform for sex education, where she offers a vast library of resources for pleasure focused sex education for adults.
[00:00:21] Charna Cassell: So we get into, in this episode, everything from how her sexuality has changed since becoming a mom, what's motivated her desire to be a sex educator, and what motivated the creation of Beducated, as well as the pleasure and the pain of different life experiences, and how that was a jumping off point for creating what she created.
[00:00:50] Charna Cassell: And , AI and how that also relates to the work that she's doing and, , how she's used AI to offer additional sex education resources. Welcome, Mariah.
[00:01:03] Learn how to live embodied If it's about to unwind Uncover new tools and start healing Leave trauma and tension behind Isn't it great laid open Let all your desires come true How can you live laid open Imagine yourself brand new. Imagine yourself brand new.
[00:01:48] Charna Cassell: So I, I'm curious about how your relationship to sex education has changed.
[00:01:54] Charna Cassell: Since becoming a mom.
[00:01:57] Mariah Freya: Yeah. So I've, I've been in the field of exploring my sexuality. Since my mid twenties and I became a mother. Beginning of my thirties. So a couple of years later, after I'd say I had this like sexual empowerment moment and then following with many, many different experiences. So when I became a mom, I was definitely in that knowledge of, okay, I know it's going to change my body.
[00:02:30] Mariah Freya: It's going to change my sex life. I knew about the stories and different mothers. sharing vulnerably about yeah, many health things and yeah, like a very diverse before after effect. I think everyone has this who becomes a mother, the sort of before and after effect, not in terms of like looks, but in terms of like, Where does it ache in my body or, and, and not just on the negative side, also on the positive side I've definitely noticed on a physiological level that, for example, I used to have these like cervical, you could say, like a tension around like the cervix and around certain ligaments that run there and after my second childbirth This kind of like tension was gone, like just because, you know, that part of, of the cervix opened up twice.
[00:03:31] Mariah Freya: And, and I guess just the contraction and all, you know, what had to kind of go through it, sort of open up also whatever was there tense. So, so that's not annoying me anymore during penetrative sex, which is a great thing.
[00:03:45] Charna Cassell: That, that's, that's, that's incredible. It's definitely, it's like people can either experience numbness or they can experience pain when there's contact with the cervix, and there can also be, you know, incredible transcendental pleasure, which is something I've, I've experienced both pain and, and deep pleasure.
[00:04:04] Charna Cassell: But this idea that. you know, that birth can be a gateway towards more opening and less pain, right? It's really, it's really
[00:04:14] Mariah Freya: I guess all the, the breathing through the contractions through the, you know, the whole process in itself is definitely like going sort of through a door of dying and waking up again, almost, you know, like, like, yeah, very, very intense experience. And I mean, I loved both of my. My birth, I the first one was more challenging because I broke my coccyx, so it's like the end of the spine, the Like tail of our ancestors and and that's still giving me pain today.
[00:04:51] Mariah Freya: So I'm, I, I still go to, to therapy to, to help it be more relaxed and not cramp up as much, but yeah, it's, it's just something like some parts of tension went away. Some parts came and of course, I mean, another level. of of transformation is definitely like your new role as a mother and what that, how that impacts my role as a lover and how I identify as a lover.
[00:05:21] Mariah Freya: So, so that definitely was an interesting journey and, and something I'm, I, I'd say still going through because I'm still in the middle of. Two young kids, my youngest, she's two years old. And like, it's definitely a very intense time. But I can already see kind of a light in the end of the tunnel.
[00:05:39] Mariah Freya: My son is now five and probably just a couple of years in where my daughter will also be much more independent. And, like it, it, it helps me then also to kind of shift back from who I was more or less before, before having kids, you know, in terms of like, like interest and going to a museum or arts gallery and just like, like getting this inspiration of things.
[00:06:06] Mariah Freya: Yeah, that also inspire me sexually and but yeah, it's getting there step by step.
[00:06:12] Charna Cassell: So that's that's like on on a personal level your relationship to your identity and your sexuality and how your experience in your body has shifted after giving birth and being a mom. And what about your business? I would imagine if, you know, in becoming a parent, there becomes a more escalated urgency of wanting there to be better resources for kids out in the world.
[00:06:38] Charna Cassell: And so I'm just, what about that for you?
[00:06:41] Mariah Freya: Yeah yeah, I mean, I, there were many different moments because running a business, there's like highs and lows. And sometimes it's more urgent, sometimes it's more relaxed. And so depending on the phase where you're in in your business, but when my son was yeah, six months old, we, Fundraised for our business.
[00:07:02] Mariah Freya: And so I was still sort of having my boy hanging on my tits, like traveling to, to Berlin to meet investors while, you know, while I'm. I was literally like full of hormones, sweaty, smelly, milk, and you know, like, like trying, like trying to be in the business world and have that in the same time, that experience of motherhood.
[00:07:32] Mariah Freya: It's, it's very different worlds, but somehow, I dunno, we still managed to convince investors and we were able to raise a million dollars for, for Beducated for our business to see if we can. You know, reach the world get more attention, grow the business and yeah, make it something really big and, and powerful and, and breaking through the barrier of yeah, of sex taboo.
[00:08:03] Mariah Freya: And yeah, so, so that was definitely a very intense moment. And then I'd say if I haven't like a natural way how to deal with the risk, of course, if you run a business, you, you might be afraid, okay, what if, you know, what if money runs out? I don't have a job. Like, what does that mean for my kids?
[00:08:24] Mariah Freya: And I guess Maybe it's also in Germany, for example, we have definitely a good social system where I know, okay, it's not like I'm gonna, you know, fall on the ground like there is a sort of net, more or less, where I will fall on and I guess that that gives me also today still a lot of reason to, you know, allow myself to take risks in a privileged world as a woman, like this is something I need to really, really make sure to use that because not, not so many out there in the world are able to do that yeah, I think that helps me in a way, and there's also just a certain trust of me and my partner. We're just a really, really good team in, in, in things of manifestation, I guess. Like, it's, like, whenever we would say, okay, let's do that, like, we would do that. Like, Like somehow I know somehow it's figureoutable, eventually
[00:09:24] Mariah Freya: Yeah. Mm,
[00:09:24] Charna Cassell: so it's interesting. I appreciate the direction you went with that question. And I was actually thinking when I was asking about urgency of getting it out there. It was more like. for the sake of why are you doing this work in the world, right? Like, I want children around the world and mothers around the world or, you know, whoever to have this resource.
[00:09:49] Charna Cassell: And it's kind of what motivates you and that often having children can be, can amplify our motivation to change or create and, you know, not just change ourselves, but change the world.
[00:10:01] Mariah Freya: yeah,
[00:10:02] Charna Cassell: And and also I just want to acknowledge, I love that you have a partner that you're on the same page with because, you know, raising, raising children, not easy on your own, not easy with another person, but to, but to have, to feel like you really have a partner in the process is, is a beautiful, is a beautiful thing.
[00:10:20] Charna Cassell: So,
[00:10:20] Mariah Freya: Yeah. And we have that on multiple levels, not just in our love life, family and business. So it's very diverse for sure. Yeah. No, sorry that I went a little bit in a different direction with that, but I. I think yeah, the, like in, in terms of motivation, I think. My children weren't necessarily like supercharging that motivation, like it was already intrinsic when I started on that journey because of my own experience that I had with sex education and with sexual tools, sexual empowerment tools.
[00:10:56] Mariah Freya: like tantra and kink and sex positive communities. So I I, I think, I think that's still like where I gain most of, of the energy from. I know what how it helped me in, in times when I didn't feel like I was powerful, strong or a woman. Yeah. So, so I think my kids were more of like, Yeah, like it makes so much sense to have them and I love them and they definitely give me a lot of energy in general, but yeah, I, I, I think I, I know just naturally.
[00:11:35] Mariah Freya: They are my kids. They're going to grow up with great sex education.
[00:11:38] Charna Cassell: hmm. Mm hmm.
[00:11:40] Mariah Freya: I think what, where I'm like, I'm planning a little bit more in the coming years for BBeducated to definitely have more education for parents around that because I definitely see that. Happening for myself. Like I will need to dig a little deeper what it means eventually when, when my boy or girl starts to ask and start to be curious.
[00:12:04] Mariah Freya: I mean, I mean, they already are curious about their bodies, but it's not like they are asking specific questions. It's just like natural to them that, you know, this is all kind of. a natural thing for them. So, , yeah, somehow I I would say I, I'm, I'm starting to get more of this like extra project next to individual education and education for couples, like really finding those niches for parents for how to build up a conversation where you feel natural as a parent, but where, where it's really easy for kids to not even develop that taboo that's, that's out there.
[00:12:45] Mariah Freya: And yeah, that's definitely something I'm, I'm excited about
[00:12:49] Charna Cassell: Mm hmm.
[00:12:50] Mariah Freya: was surely impacted by, by my kids. Yeah.
[00:12:55] Charna Cassell: you've mentioned that there was a moment, kind of like a turning point, where you felt you either had, like, an empowered moment in your sexual evolution, and I'm curious if you'd like to share more about that.
[00:13:08] Mariah Freya: It's, mainly. A workshop that Phil and I did in India where we learned Vava massage and we explored the g-spot spot for the first time, which I didn't know about back in, I mean, it was probably like 13 years ago. Where. Yeah, first off, I didn't know that this pleasure part even existed because back then it was, there wasn't a lot online around sex education. There were maybe a couple of teachers back in the day, but you would really need it. You would have really needed to look for it and really. Yeah. Now, I mean, there's, I would say through Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, podcasting, there's so, so much available and I, and I think that's a great development. I can really see from where we're coming from to, to more and more available for every taste and desire and orientation, but so that moment when we visited this workshop in India Yeah, so, so we learned it in a, in a theoretic way and then the homework was to explore it in the evening together.
[00:14:24] Mariah Freya: So, so we did that and, yeah, it was for me the first time I just felt the whole G spot area and I could sense that there was something like, like heating up sort of like a, like suddenly would put more wood in the fire or something like, Like it's, it's burning up and the next moment I would completely gush full of my, the whole bed would, would be full of squirt.
[00:14:56] Mariah Freya: So there was like really a lot of liquid coming out of me from like one moment to another. And and that was definitely something kind of like, like, like a manifestation of, of. of that sexual pleasure. Like in that moment it just felt like okay, like this is, this is proof that there's so much here and I really need to dig in deeper and like it was a material proof for me.
[00:15:23] Mariah Freya: Also very pleasurable experience and, and something that really to, to dig into my anatomy, to explore my body, to. see what else is there that I might not know to think about my desires and, and also realize some of those fantasies that, that I didn't know existed. And, and and actually later on the journey, I also discovered that I went through some of sexual assault in my teenage years and also childhood which I, I kind of. I knew, but I never could put like a name to it. Like it was just something weird and I put into the weird category and never opened that box again. So that was an important thing along the way for me to realize, okay, there's really a powerful part inside of me. And with opening that up, of course, there were many more things that I opened up and it was just something very, very beautiful and of course also very vulnerable and sad, but eventually I could see how that would supercharge me as a, as a person, as an individual, as a woman, just feeling way more confident and able to do things somehow.
[00:16:47] Mariah Freya: Like, before I felt sexually more like, very passive and very, you know, more like, like, like an object, like somebody's playing with me, but I'm not playing. And, and I think, I think it's, it's something that yeah, over tens of thousands of years, yeah, 10, 000 years, you could actually say humanity started with property, the hunter gatherer stopped walking around, being nomads, and they started to settle.
[00:17:20] Mariah Freya: And that's when, that moment when we started to settle, that's when we also started to you know, use property as something that we own, like suddenly the land would own, would belong to us suddenly. Yeah, marriages were invented suddenly women were property. So I think there's still a lot in, in especially By the owners or women identifying as women and DNA of like being a property to someone and yeah, like letting go of that and, and being more active, becoming more active role is something very, very powerful and motivates me to this day to continue our work with BBeducated.
[00:18:08] Charna Cassell: So in that I hear that there wasn't only this like a surprising pleasure and literal gushing of pleasure, right? This, this physical release in your body opening and then you getting really excited about exploring more about like, how does this body work? What other forms of pleasure exist that I don't even know about?
[00:18:28] Charna Cassell: But then there was also a really big opening as a result of recognizing certain boundary crossings or experiences of assault as traumatic and then the process of healing through those things and seeing the value in both the pleasure and the pain of experiences and how that can fill you out
[00:18:49] Mariah Freya: Hmm. Yeah. Thank you for, for mirroring that. That's a great way to put it. And yeah, I'd be curious, like for you, would you say when you started on, on your own professional journey, did you also have like one specific moment or was it also more of a. many different points. Like I, I think it's always very interesting for individuals who are in this field, what made you go into this field?
[00:19:20] Mariah Freya: Mm.
[00:19:20] Charna Cassell: There's so much. When I was in high school, so I, I have a history of sexual trauma starting as a child a number of experiences. And so as a teenager I had a lot of dysregulation in my nervous system and anxiety. So even if I had a crush on a boy or anyone. I would get flooded and overwhelmed, so I had very little capacity to be with any kind of turn on in my body.
[00:19:52] Charna Cassell: But I was also very curious about sexuality, and so I would study it in terms of like, rape prone, rape free societies, if there was a history. Or debate that needed to be done. I was always researching things. It showed up in my art. You know, it was what I read about so those were the, these themes and threads that made their way all through, you know, junior high onward for me theoretical exploration in college, you know, I discovered Carol Queen.
[00:20:19] Charna Cassell: Do you know her? Exhibitionism for the shy. She's a, Pretty well known sex educator in the Bay Area, and she ended up being someone who was a teacher for me in, at Good Vibrations. She, I met her there, she worked there with me. So, for me, it was trying to understand and make sense of sex and sexuality.
[00:20:39] Charna Cassell: I also came out as a teenager and identified as bisexual and then as a lesbian until my late 20s. So there wasn't one moment, but then healing somatically, starting to do that work in my 20s, helped me feel safe. safe enough in my body to be able to start to feel pleasure versus get so dysregulated I would dissociate, shut down, and then cut people off. So that was a, that was a huge turning point and it was why I ended up, you know, I just wanted to. Keep doing the work for myself. And then I just thought this is making such a difference for how I orient not just around sexuality I hold sexuality very broadly in terms of how can I allow my life force to move through my body and and just live a Vibrant existence and feel safe in the world and in relationship to people So the turning point was doing somatic work and and then going okay, I want to offer this to other people I was a sex educator before I was a somatic Coach or or psycho.
[00:21:39] Charna Cassell: I became a psychotherapist after that.
[00:21:42] Mariah Freya: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I, I, I feel a lot, a lot of people who are starting with the theoretical part or more the Mm. Like just mind work or emotional work, and then suddenly you, you discover the, the, the somatic or the body work that's can be still such a turning point. We, yeah.
[00:22:02] Charna Cassell: There's an important safety I think it's kind of like if you can't cry for yourself, you can watch a movie that's really sad and cry for the character in the movie. And so intellectualizing creates a safe distance for people often, at least it did for me to read about things theoretically before putting my body into them.
[00:22:21] Mariah Freya: Hmm.
[00:22:21] Charna Cassell: and so. If there's a history of trauma, you need to work with nervous system regulation before you can jump right into pleasure practices, right?
[00:22:32] Mariah Freya: I mean, wouldn't you say in your experience that most of us have, have some, somehow not really learned the way of, like, Mm Holding pleasure naturally, like, let's say you really have this amazing, pleasurable experience out of nowhere. Like, like it's really hard for probably most people to contain that and keep that.
[00:22:57] Mariah Freya: I mean, most people have. probably between five to six minutes sex, right? Because it's such an intense experience, like they can't bear it. So they do it so quickly and fast because it's just so intense with, you know, so many taboos and so many emotions and feelings in inside of them that it's just like, and then, okay, let's go and finish.
[00:23:21] Mariah Freya: And, you know, like it's. Like that's, that's what, what, what I see with our users that,
[00:23:29] Charna Cassell: Yeah.
[00:23:30] Mariah Freya: you know, those simple practices like eye gazing or just cherishing and breathing in the moment together, like, That can be so scary because it feels like so long and, you know, it's so intimate and vulnerable and we're not really able to, you know, bear that or like,
[00:23:50] Charna Cassell: Well, it's, it's, making eye contact, just making eye contact can produce so much sensation in the body and then can also produce all sorts of fears and thoughts and, you know, if you were in your family, if you were hit when you made eye contact. Right. Like if you had to be submissive in your family, you know, there's so many things outside of this, the sexual moment that you're engaging in that flood in when you're being intimate with another human.
[00:24:20] Charna Cassell: And if you're not ready to feel the range of emotions and sensations, yeah, it's asking a lot of somebody to just dive into that, right? I'm curious in your so what you're offering, right? Like, so you decided, wow, there's, this is, this is a huge awakening for me. I want to bring this to other people. I want more people to be Beducated.
[00:24:38] Charna Cassell: And this is what's special or different about the resource that you're offering? Unlike, as you said, almost like we're saturated with information through podcasts and YouTube, et cetera, courses, and so can you speak to what services you're offering?
[00:24:58] Mariah Freya: Yeah, sure. So, at BBeducated, we have a platform that gives you sort of, On a silver platter, many different options and choices and fantasies and, and educational tools that help you where you at on your journey. And so it's sort of like an individualized journey you. Jump on board with a subscription.
[00:25:23] Mariah Freya: You get access to all online courses at once. It's, it's sort of like a Netflix of sex education where everything is in one place. We have over 50 different instructors offering their online courses, which are self paced. So you do it from the comfort of your home and your own time. And everyone is sort of, offering something unique, different from sexual orientation to role play to shibari, rope kinky practices to healing traumatic experiences, so healing practices, which can be done sort of, in, in, as a self practice.
[00:26:08] Mariah Freya: But of course there's always, especially with trauma, it's always recommended to have also your professional therapist on your side with that one. We have many massage courses that support, especially couples, I'd say, who are in long term relationships you know, wanting to explore something new, get some new impulses.
[00:26:31] Mariah Freya: So, yeah, you might say, okay, if I log in, there's maybe so much, I'm almost a little bit overwhelmed because there's so much, but if you're sort of digging deeper start the onboarding, you get some questions on what you like, what you don't like, we recommend you like certain courses that you can try out and it's, it's then like a tasting, right?
[00:26:54] Mariah Freya: Like. So you're trying these different sweets and little pieces of cakes and some of them you like, some of them you don't like. And it's sort of like a journey. And, and I think there are many, many different resources on, on different platforms, but I'd say we have sort of like a collection of things and you can just go there and you know, there will be something.
[00:27:19] Mariah Freya: That is interesting to you, like, because, because you might discover maybe one teacher who talks about sex, but somehow they only cover a specific niche that might not always be interesting for you, you know, wherever you are on your journey. So. If I'm, for example, in my mid twenties, I'm definitely interested in more of the adventurous things, the dating part the hookup part, the staying safe part, consent.
[00:27:49] Mariah Freya: Later I might be more interested in my mid thirties, you know, to feel more sexy libido work, you know, getting my desire back, rekindling my marriage after, after children. Or yeah, towards our forties, maybe there's more of a menopausal things or, or when I'm, I'm more feeling like, okay, I'm, I finally divorced from my partner.
[00:28:15] Mariah Freya: Let's now start, you know, a great adventure, you know, wherever you're at. I think there's, there's like something unique, a unique, unique teaching and a unique instructor that. Or expert that can support you. And, yeah, I'd say we sort of have that space where you can just go and get inspiration for that.
[00:28:38] Charna Cassell: And you also teach genital massage among other classes,
[00:28:43] Mariah Freya: Yeah, so I personally offer the Yoni and Linga massage, which is something that I'm just very passionate about because it's was a practice that really helped me a lot. And so I studied it and, and laid it out in an online course. But yeah, since. More than eight years I haven't been practicing that or being like, I'm, I'm not a active not in, in, in an active practice at the moment because mainly my passion became Beducated and being a founder, building a team and of course curating the content and making sure we have great and insightful content for our users.
[00:29:24] Mariah Freya: Yeah.
[00:29:24] Charna Cassell: Yeah. And in those, the, the lessons that you did teach, because I, I looked at a bunch of the different classes, is that your partner that you're teaching with?
[00:29:34] Mariah Freya: No, that's not my
[00:29:35] Charna Cassell: Oh, okay.
[00:29:36] Mariah Freya: a good friend of mine.
[00:29:37] Charna Cassell: Got it. I was curious. I was like, that's, you know, cause I know that you've, your, your partner that you have children with is also your business partner in a variety of ways.
[00:29:46] Charna Cassell: And I thought, Oh, you're co, you know, co creating with him in that way. So at this point, cause I was curious, like, what are the other kinds of classes that you enjoy teaching? But at this point, it's really about creating this community and creating this infrastructure for all these other teachers.
[00:30:03] Mariah Freya: Yeah. It's, it's mainly a big resource of of tools of journeys, information hands on practices, tips Yeah, we're building a little niche on edu porn as well. So there's a little bit of porn, but combined with education. So, you know, this might not be for everyone, but this is, you know, there's so many niches within
[00:30:28] Charna Cassell: hmm. Mm
[00:30:28] Mariah Freya: umbrella of sex education.
[00:30:30] Mariah Freya: And yeah, I think most of our users, they, they come to our platform and they realize, okay, wow, like I thought there's only tantra massage and now I'm realizing there's so much more. So I think it's, it's this aha moment that a lot of people have with bet you catered that. Yeah, there's not just one tool or one method, like it's just so diverse and something for everyone there.
[00:30:58] Charna Cassell: It's interesting you didn't mention it, but I'd love to talk about it, that there's an AI component.
[00:31:04] Mariah Freya: So, with also the, the rise of, of AI, we were working on a project to see, okay, how can we help our users to find the material that they looking for? Because some of our courses have over 10 different modules with many, many videos underneath. So it can get quite like every course can be a rabbit hole.
[00:31:28] Mariah Freya: And what if I'm just looking for something very specific? And and so we created the AI sex coach, which is basically a chat GPT combination with our lessons. So, so it's sort of, so we coached the ChatGPT, so it's sort of based on all of our lessons. And in the same time, it uses AI to navigate through our library and come up with suggestions for you.
[00:31:57] Mariah Freya: So you can pretty much ask the AI coach anything. Also sexual related, because if you, for example, ask ChatGPT, The AI, like one of, one of the many AI chats = you often get an answer around sex education that this is an inappropriate question. And the, the way it answers you is also very vague and very vanilla and very like sort of tiptoeing around it, not really answering it.
[00:32:31] Mariah Freya: straightforward. So we tried to come up with, sort of the best out of two worlds in a way, like the power of AI and our huge library, which is probably the biggest sex education library in the world. So combining that we gave birth to the, the sex AI coach. And that is now.
[00:32:51] Mariah Freya: Also part of our platform. So you, so you can use within the browser app, you can use AI coach and ask it, okay where do I find a specific lesson on de armoring my pelvic floor? Let's say just as an example. And then it's sort of. Shares with you the lesson that MBeducated has with a link to that lesson but also it can answer generally certain things that you're curious about certain fantasies you may have, or, you know, just more anatomical questions you may have.
[00:33:28] Mariah Freya: So, yeah, it's, it's an interesting tool. It's something I think our users appreciate and let's see where it also leads because it's definitely. It's still an experiment, something new, something we
[00:33:43] Charna Cassell: Mm hmm. Mm hmm.
[00:33:44] Mariah Freya: used before. And I'm definitely excited about it and yeah, looking definitely forward to some more of this type of work for sure.
[00:33:55] Charna Cassell: So, that's so interesting. You know, I think I might be one of the only people out there, there's some other Luddites who, Have not tried Chat GPT yet, right? But this idea that you took kind of a conservative or prudish robot or, you know, chat bot, whatever you want to call it.
[00:34:15] Mariah Freya: I mean, intrinsically, it's not, it's not prudish, but the developers or the makers kind of put a filter on it that it's not allowed to. Like share what it knows about.
[00:34:28] Charna Cassell: well, so that's what I'm interested. I'm curious. Like, how did you then if I don't, I have no understanding of how chat GBT works. How did you remove the filter? You in Beducated yet. Because basically think of, think about a human, right? So you have a human who's not exposed to something and then thinks, I'm going to go to hell if I talk about sex or they're conditioned to, you know, feel tremendous shame about sex or and then once they're Beducated or have, they have a, you know, a cervical orgasm or whatever kind of awakening they have, they then start to open to that.
[00:35:01] Charna Cassell: They have language for their experience. How do you even train a chat GBT to How does the filter get removed?
[00:35:12] Mariah Freya: Yeah. So, so in a way we sort of plugged in our yeah, you could say not our system, but the, the AP like we use the AP and, and connected with chat GPT. And we simply told it that it shouldn't. throw out the warning on sex education, because this is mainly for educational purposes. And also with the normal chat GPT, if, if you ask it, for example, tell me more about squirting, it, it will sort of Pop up a warning message.
[00:35:51] Mariah Freya: This is against our guidelines.
[00:35:53] Charna Cassell: Hmm.
[00:35:54] Mariah Freya: but here is your answer and sometimes it doesn't even answer. And then you have to kind of dig a little deeper. Also a lot of users are. their reaction is, Oh, so I'm not allowed to ask further. So they don't write. So we remove that layer.
[00:36:11] Mariah Freya: And think through, I mean, I would need to ask my AI developers To really, really give probably the correct answer, but it's, it's mainly it's brief that it's mainly educational and that's how it seems to be fine. But in the same time, we've also got lost one account already with chat GPT.
[00:36:34] Mariah Freya: So they don't seem to like us so much. So we created a new one. So it, it seems like. Yeah, let's see for how long our AI coach will survive, but yeah, it, it, it could be that eventually they, they are shutting it down because they don't like what they are seeing.
[00:36:54] Charna Cassell: you know, it makes me a little crazy as, as someone who is also cares about education and being on Instagram and Facebook
[00:37:03] Mariah Freya: Which also comes with a lot of
[00:37:05] Charna Cassell: well,
[00:37:06] Charna Cassell: and,
[00:37:06] Mariah Freya: allowed to say sex or write sex.
[00:37:09] Charna Cassell: Well, immediately, you know, Shadowband, like, I can't advertise, I have a a course that I'm going to be releasing, but I can't advertise online, right? But yet, you scroll through and you see this other stuff and you see people's You know, body parts hanging out and very explicit sexual things, and it's, it's infuriating.
[00:37:28] Charna Cassell: It's like you're trying to provide an educational service. And then it makes me go, okay, so who are the people, who are the creators behind this? And why are they trying to prevent that education? And what's the, what are the belief systems there? And, you know, who are they trying to
[00:37:43] Mariah Freya: Yeah. I mean, what makes sense to me is, , those platforms are family friendly platforms, so, so they need to somehow make it family friendly that potentially kids can browse there.
[00:37:59] Charna Cassell: Yeah. Right.
[00:38:02] Mariah Freya: And yeah, I guess with like probably first filter or intention was, but I mean, we need to ask Mark Zuckerberg is, is sort of like to prevent yeah, the erotic field or pornography being.
[00:38:19] Mariah Freya: Visually there, because I mean, the internet is full of porn. Like let's face it. It's like, if, if you go on, on Google, you'll find it for sure. Which doesn't have such, such a filter unless it's you have a safe search on. But yeah, it's, it's definitely. Yeah, it's, it's the same taboo that we are dealing with individually and that's, Big tech is sort of just multiplying to this day, and I think it's, it's very important for people like us for you, you know, who have great teaching and something that, you know, helps people to overcome trauma.
[00:39:02] Mariah Freya: It's can be such an amazing thing for, for an individual to overcome these anxieties and blocks that stand in the way. And , I feel like with every ban or every restriction, I'm just getting more, more motivated to continue doing it because I know, yeah, exactly.
[00:39:22] Mariah Freya: That's why we need to do it. And of course it's, it's a hard way. It's, it's, it's not easy for, for this industry. To, to grow and, and, you know, reach more people. But in the same time, I feel like society slowly changes, whereas maybe big tech hasn't changed yet. But people are demanding more of that. They are more interested in, in, you know, feeling more whole sexually in, in their love lives being able to communicate what their needs and all that.
[00:39:58] Mariah Freya: So, yeah, I. I have hopes in humanity that, that eventually more from the ground up
[00:40:06] Mariah Freya: than top down. Yeah.
[00:40:08] Charna Cassell: Mm hmm. And if you could have the ultimate impact that you aspire to, what would that be? What would you like to see happen?
[00:40:21] Mariah Freya: Yeah. I think we are definitely more of an entry point for someone, yeah, maybe like, like around 18 years old or maybe a slightly younger where. Maybe someone like a sex coach could navigate a class through BBeducated, you know, that could be a great starting point to talk about things that, you know, this exists and, and you can explore this and this is safe for you if you, you know, know what you like, what you don't like, and that's why you need to explore yourself and all that.
[00:40:57] Mariah Freya: So I think to be sort of this like entry point, not for young people and then of course for. for anyone at any age who wants to explore themselves, who wants to get new impulses, and then from there discovering this whole world of sex education, of sex positivity, of tantra, of whatever they are looking for.
[00:41:24] Mariah Freya: And then maybe coming to that point with those tools that they're learning from the comfort of their home by themselves to decide, okay, now I'm, I'm going to a sex coach or, okay, now I'm actually getting myself physically somewhere where I can learn more about that, ,
[00:41:40] Charna Cassell: hmm.
[00:41:42] Mariah Freya: because like learning from the comfort of your home with an online platform is definitely a safe in, in a way that.
[00:41:52] Mariah Freya: You don't overstep certain boundaries because if you, let's say you don't have that experience and you just go there with a blank sheet and to a workshop you, you might end up in a negative situation just because you don't know anything about your boundaries. So if I have a certain basis of education.
[00:42:12] Mariah Freya: Through a platform like ours that, that can help you navigate more safely and also find the right instructors for yourself that also avoid, you know, retraumatization and, and,
[00:42:25] Mariah Freya: um, getting yourself again into trouble or for the first time into trouble. So, yeah, I'd say it's, it's sort of like, the basics and then from there you're empowered, you know, to explore more if you want.
[00:42:39] Charna Cassell: Mm hmm. When I was looking at your courses and everything, and The way that you've described it, it has me think of how you can get a subscription to an online yoga studio and you get to choose like what level of class you want to take and maybe you resonate with a certain style and so you get to know what feels right for you.
[00:43:00] Charna Cassell: And as you said, I think that's a really important point, which is if you have no point of reference for what yes feels like or no feels like or good, what good or bad. Feels like you haven't done any exploration. You're more vulnerable to persuasion and crossing your own boundaries, like even in yoga, right?
[00:43:18] Charna Cassell: You might do a pose that that, that your body doesn't want to do and you might hurt yourself. If you're not going at your starting and going at your own pace. So there's, there's definitely value there. I'm curious if there's a practice of some kind. I always end my podcast with an exercise or some kind of guided five minute exercise.
[00:43:41] Charna Cassell: Is there anything that you would like to guide the listeners in?
[00:43:44] Mariah Freya: Hmm. I mean, I can share a little practice that you can try out at home the next time you are showering, because that helped me a lot as a mother. You hardly have any time for yourself. And I think the only time where you have. Yeah, where you really, by yourself, is on the toilet or in the shower.
[00:44:11] Mariah Freya: So it's like kind of the best safe space
[00:44:14] Charna Cassell: Mm hmm.
[00:44:15] Mariah Freya: for, for anyone. Or if you have a puppy, you know, yourself, like
[00:44:21] Charna Cassell: I have to
[00:44:21] Mariah Freya: showering is your safe space. So,
[00:44:24] Charna Cassell: What's ironic is I, I bring, not every time I shower, obviously, but that's where I wash my dog in the shower with me. And so that the puppy doesn't rip stuff up. If she's not in a crate, I bring both the dogs. I bring them both and they settle. Cause there's like the bathroom's a big crate and they just like sit there while I like do my morning routine.
[00:44:45] Charna Cassell: So it's so, nope, but yes, I love it. I love imagining all the moms. Because a lot of moms do not get to poop without interruptions,
[00:44:53] Mariah Freya: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
[00:44:54] Charna Cassell: let's come back to you in the shower and the shower practice.
[00:44:59] Mariah Freya: Yeah. So, first of all, I think the, the, the water flowing over your body is just an amazing element of like, just washing away whatever. isn't needed right now. So just kind of like imagining how the water is, washing, everything away from, from your body or not necessarily only cleaning, but in a way, just refreshing, nurturing your body.
[00:45:33] Mariah Freya: and then when, when you taking the soap just mindfully kind of, Put it on, on your hand and smell it.
[00:45:41] Mariah Freya: Maybe you have some really nice organic, natural soap that you're using. And instead of like just rubbing, you know, back and forth your arms and your legs and your vulva and armpits, like. Just kind of like do it much slower than you would usually do it. Like, like just more mindful instead of like rubbing your body like an object that needs to get clean.
[00:46:14] Mariah Freya: Like just treat it more as something that you appreciate, treat it something how you would maybe clean your partner if, if they ask you to, yeah, help, help them shower. So just more kind and And mindful in a way. And yeah, just, just that can be an amazing realization. And then from there, of course you continue your shower.
[00:46:44] Mariah Freya: And then when you, when you finished, you step out of the shower and, and you, you use a beautiful oil or body cream that you like. And, and again, like, instead of like rubbing your body. like it's an object, it's something that you appreciate, that you worship, that you really see as something powerful, something that needs to, you know, be treated well and kind and nurtured.
[00:47:13] Mariah Freya: So, So just kind of, massaging your body and, and going into a smooth kind of flow of, of oiling yourself, putting the cream on is, is an amazing way to just connect. And then, and then there's this connection and then, you know, door opens, dogs or kids, husband or wife comes in and, but there was that moment of connection. And from there, I think it's going to be much easier to kind of navigate and make decisions and communicate and so on. And yeah, very simple, but profound
[00:47:55] Charna Cassell: Yeah,
[00:47:55] Mariah Freya: can highly recommend to try.
[00:47:57] Charna Cassell: Thank you. Yeah, I'm a big believer in what I call micro practices, right? So anything like feeling the warmth of the water, the scent of your soap, the feeling of, you know, the quality of the contact that the water makes with your skin. And I really liked that you're comparing it to how touching yourself the way you would touch or treat your child or your caregiver.
[00:48:23] Charna Cassell: or your partner in terms of a certain level of presence and care, not just thinking about groceries and rubbing, the dirt off your skin or something. And is there anything else? How can, how can listeners find you and is there anything else that you want to share or make sure that listeners know before we start to wrap up?
[00:48:44] Mariah Freya: Yeah. So, if you'd like to explore BBeducated, you can visit us at BBeducated. com. So, like, Beducated, but in the bedroom, BBeducated.
[00:48:56] Charna Cassell: Love it.
[00:48:57] Mariah Freya: And Yeah, I welcome you into the space. We do have a free trial, so you can check it out for one day. And if, if you enjoy it, it's there's like a monthly and a yearly offer, so, we usually have a discount running or some promotion.
[00:49:15] Mariah Freya: So just visit the page and you'll find everything. And yeah I think if, if you're listening to that, I'm, I'm sure you're already. on a journey of growth and on, you know, seeing a sex life as a, as an important pillar of your self development and, and happiness. And I really appreciate you Chana for creating that space and for you know, sharing your intentions and, and your ideas and, and, and beautiful teachings with everyone and it's, it's just, it, it's, it's somehow for me realizing, hey, like, I'm great where I am.
[00:49:57] Mariah Freya: And it's, it's, it's amazing, you know, we've come so far and like in that gratitude of that just being in that gratitude of where you're at and, and that there's no, no rush, like step by step and you'll be fine. Yeah.
[00:50:14] Charna Cassell: Yeah. Thank you. I appreciate it. Thank you for the work that you're doing in the world.
[00:50:19] Charna Cassell: If you've found this podcast helpful, share it with anyone you can, any way you can.
[00:50:26] Charna Cassell: Please rate, review, and share it with friends so others can find our community of healing. You can also follow me at Late Open Podcast on Instagram and Facebook, and read more about my work@passionatelife.org. You can also sign up for my newsletter to stay informed. This has been Laid Open Podcast with your host, Charna Cassell. Until next time, may this podcast connect you to new resources and empower you to heal yourself
