Written by Charna Cassell for The Manifest Station
“The hand that still works grips, won’t let go.”
-Margaret Atwood, A Visit
I recently turned 45 and for the last few years, I’ve dreaded my birthday. Not for reasons you might think, like sagging skin or facing my mortality or no longer making certain age-group cut-offs on dating apps. I’ve dreaded it year after year, right around my birthday, I re-experience the pattern that was imprinted on me before I could talk.
